Adoption update
Last week, Chris and I had our first meeting with LDS Family Services to discuss more details of adoption. It was INCREDIBLY exciting! We sat in a room with about 8 other couples and I just couldn't help but feel this automatic bond with all of them, though they were complete strangers. To know that there was this room full of people who were experiencing the same thoughts, feelings, and emotions as we were was really comforting! I then had this little devil on my shoulder who whispered to me that I was in some sort of competition with these people, each hoping and striving for the same goal. As I took time to process this thought later on that evening, I realized how absolutely ridiculous it was! There is no competition, only WHAT is right and WHEN it is right. Although each of us in that room are shooting for the same goal at this particular time in our lives (to ultimately finally know the joy of having a child of our own), the most important aspect of all of this is that it will be right when it is right -- when the right birth mother finds the right adoptive couple for the right child. I look forward to that knowing feeling that our child has found us and we have found them and it is RIGHT!
The meeting was really wonderful. When we walked in the door, we saw an old friend from a previous ward we were in and found out that she is actually a case worker for our area. So, chances are, we will get to work with her, which will be great, since we already know her and like her so much. The meeting presented some of the basics of adoption, where we go from here, etc. But the best part of the whole meeting, the part that brought tears to my eyes and a nervous excitement to my tummy was when they talked about what placement is like! I just felt a small, tiny little taste of what that will be like -- that first moment we see our baby and get to hold him/her! I wanted to dance around the room with excitement! I also thought of my friend, Tiff, who is leaving tomorrow to pick up her little baby girl from China! I can't even imagine the emotions of those first moments and I look forward to them so much!
Now we start the long and laborious process of paperwork, questions, interviews, house visits, background checks, etc. in order to get our profile done. I had a thought as I was thumbing through the endless pile of papers, about how strange it is that anyone under the sun can get pregnant and have a baby and they are not asked any questions, are not required to give their life story to anyone, and they aren't evaluated on how fit they are to be a parent (and I'm sure there are many who are not ready for such a responsibility). But the minute someone wants to adopt, they better be prepared to share every detail of their life and their ableness to care for a child. Strange, isn't it? But I don't care -- I am an open book, as long as it means I get to be a mommy! I am just getting used to the fact that it will probably be a few months before our profile is even ready and available for viewing. That's not exciting to me, because I am sooo antsy! But once the profile is done, then we are ready to be put out there and ready for some special mommy to find us and hopefully pick us!
It is all very exciting and I will keep the updates coming!
The meeting was really wonderful. When we walked in the door, we saw an old friend from a previous ward we were in and found out that she is actually a case worker for our area. So, chances are, we will get to work with her, which will be great, since we already know her and like her so much. The meeting presented some of the basics of adoption, where we go from here, etc. But the best part of the whole meeting, the part that brought tears to my eyes and a nervous excitement to my tummy was when they talked about what placement is like! I just felt a small, tiny little taste of what that will be like -- that first moment we see our baby and get to hold him/her! I wanted to dance around the room with excitement! I also thought of my friend, Tiff, who is leaving tomorrow to pick up her little baby girl from China! I can't even imagine the emotions of those first moments and I look forward to them so much!
Now we start the long and laborious process of paperwork, questions, interviews, house visits, background checks, etc. in order to get our profile done. I had a thought as I was thumbing through the endless pile of papers, about how strange it is that anyone under the sun can get pregnant and have a baby and they are not asked any questions, are not required to give their life story to anyone, and they aren't evaluated on how fit they are to be a parent (and I'm sure there are many who are not ready for such a responsibility). But the minute someone wants to adopt, they better be prepared to share every detail of their life and their ableness to care for a child. Strange, isn't it? But I don't care -- I am an open book, as long as it means I get to be a mommy! I am just getting used to the fact that it will probably be a few months before our profile is even ready and available for viewing. That's not exciting to me, because I am sooo antsy! But once the profile is done, then we are ready to be put out there and ready for some special mommy to find us and hopefully pick us!
It is all very exciting and I will keep the updates coming!
posted by Chris Grover at 2:11 PM
6 Comments:
Karli,
How exciting! It took me 4 months to complete my paperwork and 14 months from there to see a picture of my baby. Once I saw the picture of Eliza I realized I would have waited forever for her. Don't get me wrong, waiting was so hard, but I wish I would have known the peace I would feel when I looked at that picture for the first time. I'll be praying that your family gets "picked" sooner than later!
Love,
Tiffany
hey karli, I don't know if this will help at all but i saw that they have a new church site called, www.ldsfamilyservices.org with info on adoptions and stuff. thought you might be interested if you want to check it out. I totally agree how sad that people can get prego and no background check is needed but when you think about it the most fit parents are the ones that are trying to adopt. It seems quite backwards. we'll all be praying for the birthmother of your baby!!! she is being used as a vessel to bring your 1st child to you. It is such an amazing thing!!! So exciting and so many emotions. =)
I TOTALLY agree with you about the "why can anyone get pg w/o any questions asked" theory. I SOOO wish there was a huge application people had to fill out to make sure they are ready!
I also know you two will be snatched up quickly by the right birth mother. You are such an amazing couple and will be a blessing and answer to the prayers of your baby's birth mother!! Thanks for the update!
This whole process will be a blessing, right? I am so excited for you-
I'm so excited for you two...now if only time would fly by!!
Karli, I have two adopted nephews. It took my sister and her hubby 7 years to decide on adoption and then they were chosen as adoptive parents after the first year. As soon as they got their little boy, my sis felt sick with the flu. It turned out to be the Egyptian Flu and in 8 more months, she turned in to a mummy! They had their own beautiful little girl. Jeff and Nikki are only 8 months apart in age. They had another girl about 4 years later, and then adopted a baby boy from India a few years after that. My sis has been actively involved in the LDS Social Services with the adoption thing and has gone on many speaking assignments. Best wishes to you ahd Chris as you start this journey. It will be a wonderful one and some very lucky baby is going to end up with some really great parents.
Love to you!
Karla
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